Choke No Joke.

A few days ago I had something frightening happen to me.  Did I break a nail? Spot another grey hair? Buy something and then find it 50% off the next day? No.  Actually, I almost choked to death – and on a doughnut.  Minus a few cases of Duff beer, I almost experienced Homer Simpson’s ‘dream death’.

All kidding aside, I had never personally experienced a choking before.  It was a surreal experience, for sure.

This is how it went down:

I was in the kitchen grabbing some snacks (because I’m a pig – oink), and picked up a Tim Horton’s old fashioned doughnut to feast on.  That particular doughnut is very dry, and I am not even sure why we had them, but alas, there it was.  A few bites into it, a portion of the doughnut lodged itself in my throat.

The infamous Tim Horton’s plain old fashioned doughnut.

At first, I tried gulping it down, but it didn’t budge.  Next, I grabbed a drink to wash it down, to no avail.  At that point the doughnut somehow expanded in my throat, blocking my airways.  I began to panic and made some garbled sound as I tried coughing it out while simultaneously trying to breathe.  Hearing strange sounds, my mother entered the kitchen to investigate the origin.  Panicking, I couldn’t even motion to her that I was choking.  I was in extreme duress and just was flailing my arms about helplessly – pleading with my eyes for help.

My mother hadn’t known I had eaten anything – unaware I was even choking – so she stood there baffled, wondering what was happening to me.

At this point only about 30 seconds had passed, but to me it felt as if hours had gone by.  Determining that no one was going to help me, I raised myself out of my wheelchair and leaned against the kitchen counter to perform the Heimlich maneuver on myself (with the aid of the counter as well).  After a few abdominal thrusts (which later caused pain to my hernia – ouch), the large chunk of doughnut dislodged itself and fell into the sink.

I honestly thought I was about to die.  I’ve experienced some scary health situations before, but nothing compares to lack of oxygen while surrounded by people not knowing how to help you.  In their defense, I did not employ the universal sign for choking (both hands on throat), but as I stated before, I was in sheer terror and panicked.  My hands were nowhere near my neck – they were shaking and flailing about in desperation.

I never, ever imagined that I would fall victim to choking – on a doughnut no less.  It was a rude awakening that this could happen to anyone, anytime, on anything.  Knowing what to do in a situation like that can mean the difference between life and death – and I am just glad I had knowledge of what to do (minus the hands on the neck thing, but I chalk that up to panic), because if I hadn’t, things would have ended a lot worse.

Thanks for reading.  Diane.

What to do if someone is choking.

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